Preparation for U’netaneh Tokef

by Rabbi Shoshana Kaminsky

As I was preparing for my first High Holy Days with you, I was frequently in touch with Rabbi Companez about prayers that she had chosen to include and exclude from services. By far, the one whose absence stuck out the most was “U’netaneh Tokef.” This is the prayer that includes the words, “On Rosh Hashanah it is written, and on Yom Kippur it is sealed: how many will pass away from this world, how many will be born into it; who will live and who will die.”

Rabbi Companez wrote that she had included this prayer prior to Covid times, and then chose to remove it. I can completely understand her decision. The Covid pandemic brought with it a capriciousness that was utterly terrifying. So many lives snuffed out and so randomly. But, of course, that randomness is with us at all times. How can it be that a young mother is diagnosed with terminal cancer while a mafia mobster lives into his nineties? How can it be that thousands of lives are swept away by flood and fire while others live comfortably on into old age? Surely there can be no pattern, because if one exists, then there is some calculus of life and death that must, by definition, be utterly unjust. The U’netaneh Tokef prayer makes it appear that on this day we stand before God to be judged, and that our fates are decided. The idea is deeply problematic

At the same time, the words of U’netaneh Tokef remind us forcefully that our lives our finite. Hopefully, they will not end in these next twelve months. But they just might. Will we kick back and live with no intentionality? Or will we accept the invitation to make each and every day matter? How will we make sure that we seal ourselves for life this year, rather than merely existing?

The prayer ends “but repentance, prayer, and righteous giving ease the harshness of the decree.” Scholars have long argued as to the exact meaning of these words. Do they mean that we have a say in where fate carries us in this next year? Certainly the Jewish organizations that flood us with opportunities to give tzedakah in the days leading up to Yom Kippur are suggesting this. Perhaps our lives can be bought back one $18 donation at a time. But a more commonly accepted interpretation is this: ultimately, we cannot control when our lives come to an end. But we do have control over the time before that. Reflecting honestly on our deeds, praying from the heart, and doing what we can to restore the balance of justice in the world have enormous power to shape our lives for the good.

A reflection from the poet Gertrude Houseman to bring us to the reciting of U’netaneh Tokef:

"I came into the world without being asked, and when the time for dying comes I shall not be consulted; but between the boundaries of birth and death lies the dominion of choice: to be a doer or a dreamer, to be a lifter or a leaner, to speak out or remain silent, to extend a hand in friendship or to look the other way; to feel the sufferings of others or to be callous and insensitive. These are the choices; it is in the choosing that my measure as a person is determined."

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Finding our own purpose